One of the keys to great martial arts is being honest with one self. Self-evaluation and self-correction is very important to growth in martial arts. Without this measure one could go down the path of self-delusion. The nice thing about martial arts – if you have a good teacher – is they will let you have some room for self-evaluation, self-correction. The personal feedback is immediate when you have to look at yourself. What will you find and correct today?
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In self-defense we seek not to hurt. We only seek balance. You see in self-defense, it not about wining or losing it is about the ending of violence and bringing a balance and order to things. Without balance and order the universe cannot flow. This paradigm shift is very important to do when you want to grow as a person also. It is not about being soft, or ego. It is about balance.